Life goes on.

Well.. I have recently realized that I absolutely miss my circle k job. I'm happy there for the most part. I love a huge portion of my coworkers, and I actually feel a part. My district job, as grateful as I am for my aunt helping me get it, is, for the most part, opposite of that. I have benefits.. Which is, you know, pretty great considering circle k has none unless you're a manager or higher. At circle k, my manager loves me. The district? Eh not so much. The district is just a bunch o politics that I really don't care to take part in. No.. I won't play your game of kiss my ass and you'll get whatever you want. No thanks. You're not paying me enough to begin with..
Heres my day in a freakin nutshell: I wake up at 3. I might push it and go back to sleep, wake back up at 5. I have 10 min to be ready and be outside for my aunt to get here. Unless my car is working, then I speed my ass to work. We leave our south yard at Ohh... 5:30. Sharp. However, if Howie has decided to be nice, it's 5:35. We get to anthem, and for the last 2 1/2 weeks, I have gotten on bus 202 at exactly 6 because we have a 30 min drive and the driver 'needs' a 10 min smoke break. You know to open their trap and talk talk talk. We drop our 2 kids off, go to the nearest frys an wait an hour. Mind you, transportation has a rule that if you're there for over and hour you must go back to the yard and clock out for however long. Then we pick up 5 kids. Then back to the anthem yard. I'm there for an hour and a half, instead of getting to leave and spend 4 hours with my daughter. Because these buses also have a middle of the day run for preschool. Either to take kids home, or to school, or sometimes even both. So I do that for an hour, then I am there for another hour and a half. Then finish off the day with a hs and elementary school run. Finishing between 4-4:15. Then at 4:30 sometimes 4:45, we leave to go back to Glendale. 30 whole minutes I sit in a bus with 3-5 men talking about drinking and sports. That's about 15 extra min I coulda spent playing with my daughter. But anyways. That's my life at the district. And it's a mon-fri type of thing.
Now let's look at circle k. I'm lead csr.. Which is whatever. It's one step away from assistant manager. I get 35-40 hours a week. This is my day. Since I normally work 2nd shift, I am waking at say... 9? Or whenever Serena wakes up, I change her, make breakfast, eat with my munchkin. Then play, do dishes or whatever grandma needs me to do. By then it's 12, so if I need to, I take a shower. Then put Serena down for a nap, or depending on if she's tired I'll do that before I get in the shower. Either way, she's asleep when I go to work. After my shower, I'm dressed an ready to go. I go to work, clock in, count what I have in my drawer. I then get to everything I need to do. Except trash. Since I normally work with smokers during 2nd shift, I make them take out the trash. All of it. Then they do outside trash, take their smoke break, then I return to my daily thing. Stock, organize, clean. Do I do it to a tee? Not exactly.. But I get most of it done. I'm far from being the most organized person, and the cleanest person. But I can be. Now when I get home, which is anywhere between 9&10 at night, Serena thinks its play time. Which is cool cuz I still miss my little munchkin no matter how long I'm away. Then we go to bed at about 11-11:30. Which is still the same for the district job.
Now I don't care what anyone says, but that's a lot of work, but it's only 8 hours away from Serena compared to 12. And it's easier than dealing with kids who don't know how to listen. Just sayin.
Now here's the problem in case you were wondering. I can't afford to live on my own. As much as I'd like to... Yeah it's not happening any time soon. Maybe after I get my cdl.. But I won't hold my breath. I have no time to go to school. Unless I'm at circle k. I don't really want to go to school after I've spent 12 hours at work. Fuck. That. I want to spend time with my 12 month old. Maybe other people can spend that much time away from their kids, but I prefer not to make it a habit. I am very attached to my child, an she is to me as well. Well, that being said.. My biggest issue is i was given an ultimatum and whether or not I can afford it, if I quit my district job and go back to circle k full time I'll have to find a place to live and daycare for Serena. Fine whatever. Can't say Ill complain too much about being kicked out. I intend to move out soon anyways.
This morning I was told that I should just put Serena on my work insurance for the summer since I can't renew her accchs a whole month in advance. Well uhhhh I can't afford that. It will take every penny out of my check. And last I checked I still have to buy her diapers an clothes and what not. So that's a no. People telling me what I need to do where my daughter is concerned really irritates me. I'm pretty sure I know what is good for my daughter and myself thanks. Because its not like I don't have a brain.